My Last Letter...

    There's something about fire that's beautiful to me. The high intensity of heat and flame burns away rubbish, all that is not of lasting substance. It leaves in it's wake refinement, purity... and ash. Ashes of something we once trusted to always be there. Ashes that remind us, all is fleeting, all is breath. Enduring the fire in life, the fire that undoubtedly will be there, and holding the ashes of that life, this is when you know there is More. 

     I've always had this unshakable feeling that we as Christians in America have it too good. If you think about it, all we do is go to Church once, maybe twice a week, hang out with our Christian friends, and are good during the week. Once in a great while we'll strike up a conversation with a non-Christian, and they'll realize our beliefs, and we'll have to defend them. All within the comfortable confines of a pretty coffee shop. 
     But I've been places where being a Christian isn't so comfortable. I've been places where I couldn't even say the words "Christian" or "Jesus" for fear of being followed and our ministry "found out." There are places in this world where it's deadly to wear the name of Jesus. And those places are full of some of the most on-fire for God people I have ever met. "On-fire" in it's truest sense. Not only are they being held over the fire of persecution, and being put through the fire of the testing of their faith, but they are consumed with the flames of the Holy Spirit. 
     Sometimes I envy them. I think, "If only it were hard being a Christian here in America. If only..." And then I stop. If I had the faith that Christians have in China, would it be hard to be a Christian in America? Yes, it would. I don't reach out and declare the gospel in the ghetto on the street corner, next to the prostitute. I'm not surrounded by Muslims in my 99% white town. I sit behind a computer screen and pray that the right person stumbles upon my testimony online. Which is a ministry, but there is no fire, no testing in that. 
     I stumbled upon a website tonight. It's called Last Letter. They are a bunch of Christians who have been ignited, and they are "on fire" to bring the word of God to the darkest places on earth. They encourage you to sit down and write a letter to those around you. As if you were going to die for Jesus and these would be your last words to your family and friends. And I sat down to write it, all proud of the words already forming in my mind. And then I started, and I couldn't write anything. 
     How would I die for Jesus? In South Dakota, in my comfortable life, in my comfortable Christianity...what would I say to Jeremiah, to Judah, to Trevor, if I were to die for Jesus and leave them behind? Could I honestly be ok with telling them goodbye, and be happy that I gave my life for Jesus? All of these emotions and questions and thoughts just ransacked my heart and took me hours of thinking and praying to actually come up with a letter...and I'm going to share it with you now. I challenge you to do will change how you view your life, your death, your Christianity. 

My Dearest Family and Friends,

Jesus is everything you need. He is breath, He is life, He is love.

Do not be afraid to live for Him. He equips those He calls, and He has called you to spread His name to the Nations. Follow Him. He will never lead you astray, He will never fail you.

My babies, Mama loves you, but more importantly Jesus loves you with an everlasting love. You will always be taken care of. You are never alone. God is there, turn to Him my loves.

Trevor, my darling, you were my partner in Christ in this great mission of love, and I ask that you continue to bring the light of the Gospel to the darkness. I loved you more than anyone on earth. I've gone Home ahead of you, but don't lose hope. We will meet again, worshiping our amazing Jesus together, side by side.

Living in love and living to glorify Jesus was my life's aim. May it now be yours...

In His Arms of Love,


  1. mb,
    this is beautiful. i absolutely love your blog & you are such a good rolemodel. i really appreciate your testimony of Christ & i hope that i can grow to be half the woman you are.
    also--super cute new layout!! where do you find all of your layouts?
    <3 alison


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